What is the worst insult you can think of

Also, how do you tell the difference between a man and a woman?

We all know that epithets are hurled, but how are insults delivered?

My mother had several levels of insults. If there was something or someone that she didn’t like, then she would say that they were “tacky”. This meant something was in poor taste or blatantly classless. But her worst condemnation would be to call someone a “clod”. Elvis Presley was a clod. Growing up in Mississippi and going to Tupelo several times with my Dad, he didn’t insult anyone. But he was adamant that Elvis ruined music. I am not sure I agree with this, but I am not sure that I would disagree either.

Most southern women would say “bless her heart” as an introduction of the worst insults against someone but saying this first would absolve anyone of guilt about it. Of course, this is transparently manipulative and pretentious. My Mom never would say this. But she might call someone tacky if she disapproved, and she frequently did.

And this brings us to the question of men vs. women. I am going to do a poll, I am pretty sure that I know how the poll results will work out, but we will see:

Q1: Are you a man or a woman?

Q2: Do you think that the Three Stooges are really funny?

Probably you could just ask Q2 to reliably get the answer to Q1.

But this might not be 100% reliable if the respondents are honest. One time I was watching Sanford and Son in the episode about Blind Mellow Jelly where Bubba said “I want my Daddy’s records”, and my Mom thought this was really funny, but then didn’t want to admit it. One time I was watching the Three Stooges where a pie was stuck to the ceiling and about to fall down, and the society lady told Moe that “he looked like the sword of Damocles was hanging over you”. And Moe replied, “lady, you’re physic”. My true love chuckled when she heard this, and I will never let her live that down. But I am sure that she would say woman to Q1 and NO! to Q2.

The Stooges had a lot of insults for each other, such as being a nitwit and imbecile. But the absolute worst insult would be to be called a stooge.

My life lesson is, don’t be a clod. You can be tacky occasionally. But don’t be a stooge.